George Washington Jokes, Stories & Tidbits
Little Suzy once asked her mother, “Do people who never tell lies go to heaven?” “Yes, her mother answered. “They are the only
ones.” “Gosh, I bet it’s lonesome up there with just God and George Washington,” said Suzy.
(101 President Jokes, Melvin Berger, © 1990, Scholastic Inc., ISBN-13: 978-0-545-1033-4, ISBN-10: 0-545-11033-5, page 3)
Teacher: “George Washington not only chopped down his father’s Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn’t punish him?”
- One Student: ” Because George still had the axe in his hand.”
(funnydb.net, http://funnydb.net/jokes/George+Washington+jokes, Joke 27314)
Why was George Washington buried standing up?
- Because he never lied.
Family Friend Jokes, http://www.familyfriendjokes.com/joke/george-washington-joke, George Washington Joke)
What would you get if you crossed the first US president with an animated character?
- George Washingtoon!
Kids Jokes, http://www.kidsjokes.co.uk/jokes/holiday/washingtonsbirthday.html, Washington’s Birthday Jokes)
Republican Senator John G. Tower of Texas liked to tell a story about George Washington when the latter, he said, was growing up on his daddy’s ranch in the High Plains of West Texas. On that ranch, said Tower, there was a beautiful mesquite tree, which George’s daddy loved, not only because it was a beautiful tree but also because it was the only tree for fifty miles in any direction. One day, when his daddy was out on the range rounding up a few mavericks and strays, George pulled on his boots, picked up his Bowie knife, and went out and whittled down that mesquite tree. When his daddy got home, he took little George out behind the corral and asked him: “George, who whittled down my mesquite tree?” “I did it, Daddy,” said George. “I cannot tell a lie.” “Pack your things, son,” his daddy said. “We’re moving to Virginia. You’ll never get along like that in Texas!”
